Gah. Doctors and tests. It would be one thing if I could get all Camille and wanly hide my encroaching death. A little Violetta and I could do some soprano vocal gymnastics and be all tragic. “Amami, Alfredo!”

But noooo. It has to be things like potential kidney infections. There’s a reason people don’t write operas about kidney infections. One can’t be wan and tragic with a kidney infection. Well, one could, but I can’t.