I went shopping last night and found a cache of fuzzy sweaters in pastel colors. I want spring dammit. Instead, I have a fuzzy pink sweater. It’s not the same.

I have no idea why I have made a fairly abrupt transformation from “wearer of mostly navy and black and other severe colors” into “Wheee! It’s PINK! IT’S PINK!!” It’s probably a sign of some horrible mental breakdown and tomorrow I’ll think I’m a fire hydrant.

Promise me you won’t let your dog pee on me, no matter what.